Thursday, July 9, 2009

Fell off the Wagon!

Argh! Why do I do this to myself? I was doing SO good. I was down to 177. Then I went on vacation, and only gained a couple of pounds. I was quite proud of myself. Then I broke my stupid foot, and apparently thought that was an excuse to eat any and every nasty fattening food out there! ARGH!

I am now back up to 196. I feel like my skin doesn't fit. Oh gee, it's just like my clothes. Luckily, I got rid of EVERYTHING weekly as it was too big. So now, I have about 3 things that fit, and I am sick of them. And to make matters worse, Rick's class reunion is in 2 weeks, and I have my yearly get together with my girlfriends in 3 weeks.

Just what did I think was going to happen as I was dousing everything in butter and cheese? I can understand a couple pounds, but how did I let 19 pounds get back where they don't belong! BLAH! I could beat myself up all day, but it won't do any good, so I am just picking up where I left off.

Last night after supper, instead of opening a beer or sitting my butt, I took the dog for a walk. This morning, instead of going back to bed, or sitting on the computer, I went for a one hour power walk. I also did a fridge overhaul and bought lots of fresh veggies, fruit, pitas, shrimp, salmon, etc.

I just get so tired of the fight. I get tired of washing two sets of clothes each day. I get tired of "being careful" with my food. I get tired of seeing others eat whatever they want and stay the same size. I get tired of being at the Y all the damn time just so I can lose 1 fricking pound.

I have yo you dieted so poorly for so many years that I am sure my metabolism is screwed beyond belief. But, I am hopping back up on the wagon again. I will not give up!!!!!!!!!